Creepy Creeperson

Dear Old Boss,

I still think about you and your creepy ways quite often. You have simply diappeared from my life over the last year and a half but for whatever reason it almost feels like you are an ex. I guess in some ways you are.

When i came to you looking for a job, i was coming out (or in the middle) of a very hard time in my life. i lost my best friend in a horrible accident, i quit my first job in new york city, and had an emergency operation. i had no direction and no goals - and all i knew was that being unemployed SUCKED. i needed a job. i interviewed a few places, nothing was very exciting, and when i came to interview with you i felt comfortable. you were unprofessional and i should have seen it from the beginning, i believe you used the work "fuck" in the interview. extremely inappropriate. but i laughed and thought, "wow, this guy could be a cool boss". you were chubby, kind of chipmunk looking, and i didnt feel intimidated by you. i was at ease in my interview, and you liked me. i knew i had the job when i walked out.

i was a bit over-qualified, simply because i had a BRAIN. you called me 2 hours later and offered me the job, and i, of course - being desperate- took it right away. You werent paying much, but my commute was only 10 minutes, and i thought it would work out nicely.

The office was small. you were just starting out and only had 5 employees. i was the youngest and no one really tried to be that nice to me. the one woman there especially took an EXTREME disliking to me. i tried to be nice, and i consider myself to be easy to get along with, but she didnt want anything to do with it. looking back now, it was painfully obvious to see - she USED to be your main attraction, but now that you had me, she was useless to you - and you were MEAN to her. You berated her, called her fat, you were the EPITOME of unprofessional and pretty much everything you said and did bordered on sexual harassment. i am genuinely surprised she didnt do anything about it. but this is coming from a woman who found her husband on an S&M website, KNEW he was having an affair, and did NOTHING about it. tried to get a divorce but backed out 2 minutes before the judge ruled it to be complete. pathetic. The whole scene was pathetic.

As i got more settled, you were more and more 'friendly' with me. You took me to lunch almost daily, paid for everything and many times i felt like we were on dates. im sure everyone else did too, but you were the boss - how was i supposed to say 'no'? that just didnt feel right, so i always went along with it. and besides, it was much more fun leaving the office for 2 hours, bullshitting with you and NOT working. so everyones dislike grew stronger. not that i tried, nor did i care.

You would suggest us doing late night work and would buy BEER while we did it. you hated your wife, your new babies, and everything that they had to offer. you never wanted to go home and would mock your wife for having post-partum depression. Even at this point, i didnt think you were creepy - i just thought we were fast-friends, and it was cool to actually get along with your boss. D hated it and HATED you, but i told him it was fine- and he was over-reacting.

As time grew on, it was apparent that you thought we were more then just co-workers. You texted me after work and on weekends. you were very shady. you made me feel very weird a lot of the time. but again, i was pretty used to it, and thought it was just the way you were. i was naive, and no one was really telling me it was wrong. then again,i kept a lot of that stuff to myself.

Then things started to get really weird.

You had to hire more people, because i did not like the position i was in and i was doing too many jobs and not being able to focus on just one thing. i was not an accountant, but you made me take that role, encouraging that i was smart & i could do it. i knew better. i can barely balance my own checkbook, so how am i supposed to take control of a new company and basically run it? each week i struggled to pay your bills and have enough money in the accounts to take care of everything.

Soon you could tell that things were looking grim, and it was stressing you out. even with the addition of a few new girls, and the old one gone - things were tense. i had no more responsibility, and you slowly took things away from me one by one. you drove me to hate you and your office. i cried in the morning thinking about going to work. you made me so miserable.

suddenly, out of the blue, you would go DAYS without talking to me, no matter what i did. i would come into your office and try to discuss things and you would say "everything was fine" like a 5 year old. you were stubborn, immature and a horrible boss. i started hating you.

you started taking away rights on my computer. you took away programs. you blocked everything on me. and when i confronted you, you told me that you "didnt know what i was talking about". you were a baby. and i hated you even more.

Many days during this hard time it took all the strength i had not to fall apart in tears at work. i was like a little girl, calling my mom for support before i lost it and told you how much of a raging dickhead you were. but i held my ground, and started searching for jobs.

I found one. It was close by, but it was a big place. I had a good feeling about it - and i knew it had potential. I didnt think the new boss would be as creepy as you had been and i took it. I gave you my 2 weeks and you told me to GET OUT immediately. so, thankfully, being the smart girl that i am, i had packed all my shit earlier in the week. I left my key and never spoke to you again.


I work nearby, and always wonder when i'll run into you. It seems like when we were in our "glory days" we were always out and about. at the bank, the grocery store, everywhere. now it's like you've dropped off the face of the earth. i dont see you at the bank that we share. i dont see you driving around in your big truck (although every truck i see i turn to see if its you. it hasnt been). i drive by your office on my way to do errands, and some days i see your car there, but still, no sighting of you mr. creepy. i wonder how our interaction will be once we finally do see each other. i will be genuinely surprised if you are still married, and if you havent buried yourself into a hole in your business venture. i still keep in touch with one co-worker, and he gives me a little gossip here and there. i did find out that you LIED and said you saw me at the gym, which is just weird. that we "talked, and i looked great/was great". what's THAT about?? really, does it make you feel better to lie? you were probably the most pathetic adolescent [and adult for that matter] and having a girl like myself pay attention to you probably felt so rewarding. but all you did was make me feel awful.

thank god that part of my life is over, and i can move on and have a healthy work environment now. i enjoy where im at, i like my boss - and we get along. granted, i still get scared that its going to turn into creepy territory but thankfully so far ive found that you were in a league of your own. Good luck, dirtbag.