being selfish

is it bad that i am jealous of everyone else getting engaged? its not so much that i am particularly in a rush b/c BELIEVE ME - im not!! the idea of making budgets, asking for money, making joint decisions on things that will NOT come easy, deciding on locations, guests, dates, colors, dresses, bridal party - ALL OF THAT - does not sound very fun to me.

but i guess just for the 'pretty jewelry' factor, i can't help but be a little annoyed.

i know im being irrational, so dont kill me here. it seems like everyone i know (aka like 25%) is either engaged, married or well on their way. someone else just got engaged on friday - she is 2 years younger than me, and has been dating her bf for 6 months less than me & D. not that these things really matter in the long run, but when someone who dated for 4 years gets engaged it doesnt seem as bad as someone who is clearly on my own playing field.

what would i do if i were to get engaged next weekend? [besides FREAK RIGHT THE F OUT]. i dont know. i mean, its clearly going to happen before 2007 is over.... i think... but ughhhhhhh i dont know i just dont want to see or hear about any more weddings, rings, dresses or crap for a long time.